Your Own Thoughts are More Important Than the Judgment of Others:


You walk into a networking function and you are immediately aware of your comparison to others and the impression you make.  If your pantsuit is crisp enough, if you’re poised enough, if you are coming off as confident enough.  One of the more stressful situations, when it comes to feelings of being judged, is within our career: we are aware of thoughts from co-workers, how we are viewed professionally,  if we are being taken seriously enough,  and how clients view us professionally. 

Not too far behind the awareness of being judged in the workplace is how we think others view us socially and personally.  Are we afraid to open up in personal relationships? Are we trying to wear a cape that transforms us into another being that pleases others but is the opposite of what your truth is? Are we always so concerned about how we dress for other people, act for other people and are viewed on the social ladder? 

If reading this gives you feelings of edginess and stress, you are not alone.   We women can get so wrapped up in the anxieties of how others perceive us, that we completely forget how we should be thinking of ourselves and treating ourselves emotionally.  

Whether you have a strong support group with your family, friends, or significant other, it is crucial for your own emotional health to focus on how you direct your own thoughts. Here are some ways that you can let go of insecurities,  feel comfortable in your own skin, and ultimately crowd out these social and work anxieties.


1.  Accept your feelings, experience them, and then strategize: If you just experienced rejection, a failure, a broken relationship, or anything that seems to have knocked you off your feet; let those feelings come to the surface. Take a couple days  to experience your deep feelings and to let them come up and out.  It will feel lousy, but the importance of expressing your feelings is crucial when dealing with a downfall.  Once you have experienced and let out your anger, sadness or disbelief, strategize and take action for what you need to do to get back on track. If you have no idea where to start, take out a piece of paper, write down three goals you want to achieve, then write down two steps to getting closer to those goals (the smaller and more realistic the steps are, the better). Once you start opening up the possibilities again and setting actions into motion, doors will open and you will find your balance again. 

2. Put your happiness first, no matter what: If you have been with the same company and it’s  making you miserable, take some time to think about other options and roads you can explore.  One of the most important aspects of your life should be your happiness. Whether you are in an insecure relationship, or you are choosing a career path that isn’t what you thought, it is never too late no matter the age  to make some changes. Again, going through changes to find ultimate happiness may come with a roller coaster of emotions, but accept them and ride through it. At the end of the day your happiness is what matters most. 


3. Allow yourself to be imperfect, and embrace your flaws: This can be mental and physical. If you are constantly picking your shape apart, really ask yourself why. Focus on internal health first: think about your eating habits, what are you eating to truly nourish yourself, how are you embracing your spirituality, and how are you being active to bring yourself energy and increase immunity. If you start focusing on internal equilibrium, you will gain more confidence and it will show on the outside. Allow yourself to indulge, to make mistakes, to go over road bumps in life and love.  An extremely effective way to learn is to make mistakes, and we all make mistakes. 

4. Share  your love, and give it your all: Many women agree that at the end of the day, no matter how much money you make or how many luxurious designer clothes you wear, relationships and love is what makes us whole. It doesn’t necessarily have to be love from a significant other, just another being that fills your heart. Maybe it’s your best girlfriend, your parents, your child, your sibling. When you open up and make a deep connection with someone and give it your all, your heart will open and your vibrational energy will be high allowing peace of mind and endless possibilities.


5. Keep calm, and be a Balanced Babe: This is one of the reasons why I am the biggest advocate for living a balanced babe lifestyle. It is all about the art of balance between mind, body and soul. Be intuitive and take a moment every day to explore how you are feeling and what aspect of your life might be out of whack. If you feel like you’ve been working too much and not making enough social connections: call up friends and plan a girls night out, volunteer for a worthy cause, plan a family get-together. If you are constantly on the go, plan out time slots during the day to deepen your spirituality whether it be praying or meditating. Or if you have been searching to find your truth for some time and are stuck in a rut, find a mentor or someone that inspires you. Bounce ideas off of them and ask them for guidance to get your creative juices flowing. The whole point of finding balance is to maintain  harmony between relationships, work, health, and spirituality. If you can check in with yourself at the end of the day and see which part of your being needs some extra TLC – you need to prioritize time to address it. 


So find your balance, enjoy your journey through life, make mistakes, and give love and positive thoughts to others. All of these factors combined will help you own your truth and empower you to be a confident and positive woman. Once you can practice these keys to directing positive thoughts to yourself, you will not even flinch at the thought of being judged by others. If you have special ways that you embrace yourself, share with me in the comments!


Main image source, here.

04 comments on “Your Own Thoughts are More Important Than the Judgment of Others:

  • M @ Live Like You're Traveling , Direct link to comment
    Great ideas that you mention here... one of the things that has helped me with this recently is in focusing on finding my *tribe*... like-minded folks that share in similar values. This helps me to remember that I can't please or intrigue everyone and I'd rather spend my time and energy on people who I don't need to "convert."
    • Sarah Baker , Direct link to comment
      That is such a powerful tool not only for a great support system but also for keeping grounded and being able to express your true being. Love this idea!
      • M @ Live Like You're Traveling , Direct link to comment
        Love what you're doing at btw... am always on the search for plantbased options in the chicago area! It always seems as though there are such limited options. Great that you are growing awareness around it!
  • Sarah Baker , Direct link to comment
    Thank you very much! What are some of your favorite places to find a healthy dish? If you are based in Chicago we will be bringing together great companies that are plant based at some upcoming events in the area.

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